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Looking For Love In All The Wrong Places?

by Geela

All that you seek you already have within you.

Practically every year finding love is at the top of Americans' list of resolutions for the New Year. That's the good news. The bad news is that most Americans are looking for love in all the wrong places.

The way I see it, the definition of love should not be limited to romantic love alone. Love is more than a sentiment. Love is a way of being. The broader definition of love should also be a longing for experiencing a life of fulfillment, purpose, meaning, inner peace, fulfillment, real joy and self-worth. After all, everything we do is to either experience more love and fulfillment or to compensate for the lack of it.

Some people have been willing to go under the knife, and endure excruciating pain, to change their looks (hoping the mirror will still be kind just a little longer and gravity will not take its toll anytime soon). Some people have deprived themselves of food while on the quest for attaining the perfect body. They have been willing to go into huge debt and endure the worst kind of pain and humiliation that comes from compromising one's integrity and selling their soul just to support a lifestyle and status they couldn't afford. Some even ignored and deprived the biggest part of their Self, their spirit, which allows them to experience all the very things they set out to attain in the first place. In short, you name it and they endured just about anything in their quest for love.

Even for those who were able to achieve material success, it was only a hollow victory since no amount of money, good looks, status and/or trophies could fill up the void inside which was created by a malnourished spirit. They too discovered that "when you get there, there is no 'there' there," and that external riches don't necessarily have the power to give us internal riches ("real love" defined as fulfillment, purpose, meaning, inner peace, real joy and self-worth) that we are desperately seeking. At best they were flirting with the illusion of love rather than experiencing the real deal.

In a "more is better" culture where vanity, and not virtue, is worshipped (consider the growing trend of reality TV shows such as "For Love or Money") it's easy to understand why we have been looking for love in all the wrong places. Yet surprisingly, we have ignored the fact that the natural state of our spirit is love, which is the driving force behind all creation. Hollywood stars, the media and multi-billion dollar industries have all
brainwashed us to believe that we are simply not adequate, worthy or good enough to be loved just the way we are and that it is only "He with the most toys, and not joy, lives." The reality is that finding true love should not be either painful and/or costly. You can find true love (in the broader definition) no matter what you have been brainwashed to believe. First you must recognize that you are a spiritual being first, having a human experience (and not the other way around) and therefore, your natural state of being is love. As such you were meant to live a life of meaning, purpose, fulfillment, real joy, inner peace, and abundance by reconnecting with your spiritual roots (living in harmony with universal laws characterized by integrity, giving and the honoring of all living things). We can't truly be happy and fulfilled without the element of giving. Real joy comes from making a meaningful difference in people's lives, when money and power are used as useful tools to help make a difference.

Next time you are tempted to look for 'love' in all the wrong places, consider the definition of real love. Most importantly remember that all that you seek is not "somewhere out there", but rather it is already within you. All you have to do is recognize it and enjoy it while you can.

Copyright © 2004-2006, Geela

Geela is an award winning singer/songwriter/composer, columnist, and author of the best-selling book "THE AMERICAN DREAM," her true-life story of how she came to America as a young immigrant with nothing and overcame incredible obstacles to achieve mega-success. She founded ONE SPIRIT, ONE WORLD to help children and promote a culture of peace and harmony..


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